Friday, January 25, 2008

Mojoloss Treatment Recommendations

When stricken by a case of mojoloss, it's important not to panic. This affliction is not uncommon and a full recovery can be expected. The following treatment is recommended by four out of five weezas*:

1. Stop the knitting by applying pressure with ass-growing couch potatoness for approximately one week. This treatment can be obtained easily through your local Netflix. Waitress** in particular is highly recommended, as this will fill your mind with Nathan Fillion neck-nuzzling fantasies, shown to be particularly effective in alleviating depression.

For full treatment to be effective, replace Keri Russell with images of self.

2. Begin healing of the stash by destashing items acquired through sale blackouts, supernewbiestashaholicsm, or those that may expire before use.

3. Take two Socks That Rock and blog me in the morning.

* Fifth weeza was unavailable for survey purposes, as she was conducting further research into the Nathan Fillion depression-lifting treatment application through the viewing of multiple Firefly episodes. Preliminary tests show promising results through freeze-framing of the naked-Mal-on-a-rock scene.

Side effects may include burning desire for pie consumption, followed by incessant singing of Pie Song. Alcoholic beverages can counteract pie desire but may exacerbate Pie Song singing. Do not drive or operate iTunes.


Blogger SJ said...

I loved Waitress. Just watched it last weekend. So good!

I hope the two STR did the trick!

4:40 AM  
Blogger Trillian42 said...

Mmmm... naked Mal on a rock...

Sorry, what were you saying? I was in my happy place for a moment there. ;)

If you find that applications of Nathan Fillion aren't quite doing the trick, I highly recommend alternating with a dose or two of John Barrowman (Torchwood) or David Tennant (Doctor Who). Or both, on selected episodes.

7:06 AM  
Blogger The Kelly Green Rogue said...

ooooh, Nathan Fillion, I'll take 2 and call you in the morning!

Don't you just love Netflix? I've been taking full advantage of their watch online feature lately.

7:49 AM  
Blogger Bezzie said...

See I seriously should have watched Firefly BEFORE Buffy to get the full heated feelings for that guy. I just imagine him with a collar and a god awful southern accent. Not sexy at all.

7:57 AM  
Blogger The_Add_Knitter said...

Supernewbiestashaholicsm--this accounts for about 40% of my stash. Random angora, weird single skeins, etc. Gah!

4:46 PM  
Blogger Batty said...

Ice cream and chocolate also help. And I strongly recommend the acquisition of brand-new sock yarn in a color you can't resist. Yum.

6:58 PM  
Blogger chemgrrl said...

*sigh* Maybe I should go rent that movie again (although I still have the pie song stuck in my head). I ended up renting Stardust twice, just to see Charlie Cox as Tristan again. He's so dreamy at the end...

What color of STR are those? Enquiring minds want to know.

9:44 AM  
Blogger prairiegirl said...

Hmmm... Nathan... yummy.

10:23 AM  

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